Moses said to the Lord, Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.” The Lord said to him, “Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.” But Moses said, “Pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else.”

Exodus 4:10-13 NIV

I love decorating- that will come as no surprise to you if you read this blog! It’s not even that I just love decorating my own home as much as I love seeing pictures and visiting other people’s homes. I love looking at all the colors, seeing all the styles, being surprised by the ingenuity of others with a DIY  project or upcycling something into a different item that I would have never thought of. 

I have my own style for my house that I call something like American heritage meets modern style/ meets vintage- with a touch of not so much farmhouse as much as a country air. Sounds specific doesn’t? What this all boils down to is that we live in an area where we have more horses and goats for neighbors than we do people, and I want my house to reflect the pastoral setting. I also love vintage so I want to embrace that in my decor but also include a few modern touches to keep it up to date. I want my home to feel collected but not too eclectic. I am in many homes and see beautiful eclectic styles, perfectly done neutrals, and refreshing minimalism. 

I see each of these and my heart beats a little faster and I wish I could be more like them in my tastes. I would love to have the classiness of a totally neutral home, I would love to feel that openness that comes with a hardcore Marie Kondo Minimalistic styled home, but alas this isn’t really me. My home is a reflection of me. I like classy, but I’m not Grace Kelly. I don’t like clutter but hard core minimalism scares me. What I am is a mix. I like neutrals with spots of color to bring everything to life. I like having a tidy house while still knowing everything I need when inspiration hits for a craft project is at my fingertips. I like this. This is me. This is how God made me. 

God makes each of us unique, one of a kind creations. While we definitely need to surrender to Him, (a never ending struggle), to polish and shape us we need to remember that He is polishing and shaping us. He is not remaking us. How much time do we waste wishing we were different? We wish we looked different, had a different life and different tastes. How much of our lives and potential to we spend fighting God on what he has given us rather than asking how we can use our uniqueness to honor Him? 

Remember Moses? He couldn’t speak well, therefore God couldn’t possibly use him to lead a nation- could He? Instead of God using Moses’s studder to bring even more glory to God, Moses ended up begging God to use someone else, which God ultimately did. What blessing did Moses forfeit by not doing as God asked? What was robbed not just from Moses but from the Israelite people because of this unwillingness on Moses’s part? 

The next time you sigh about a part of yourself not being like you wish, think whether this is truly something that needs to be improved, or whether it is in the neutral category. If it’s not a bad thing, then ask God to show you to what purpose He would like you to use this specific thing. The answer may shock you.