Show, don’t tell, is one of the rules of great writing. Don’t tell your audience that the plush blanket is soft, show them how the million little plush fibers kiss your skin as you pull the blanket close and warm around you. This is how I felt Brian Stevenson handled the telling of his professional life in his book, “Just Mercy.” I’m sure you’ve noticed that there is a lot of tension in our country right now. Things always heat up when a presidential election is less than 2 months away! Add to that that this year we are also dealing with the coronavirus, and heated race relations and it seems like gasoline is being dumped on every fire that usually lies simmering within this country. During the course of discussions being had over the current events in our country, someone recommended a book called, ”Just Mercy,” to me, and I checked it out from the library.
Wow. I’m not sure what exactly I expected; but this book surpassed my expectations. I think I expected a book that was either so agenda driven that there wasn’t much of a plot line, or one that went into so many statistics that I wouldn’t barely be able to focus, but that’s not at all what this book was. Instead this was a book with a compelling plot line spun throughout its pages that showed the flaws in our justice system, and that got its point across in a fair, example driven manner.
Bryan Stevenson, the author, has spent his life as an attorney representing the underprivileged wrongly convicted of high level crimes. At the beginning of his career he focused just on cases of individuals who he believed were wrongly sentenced to death row. There are truly frightening examples given in this book of how the facts have been manipulated against certain individuals, and how many have paid the ultimate price for someone else’s agenda.
I found this book very eye opening, the issues of our justice system are not ones that I have done very much research on, and while I plan to do more learning on this topic, I thought this book was a good intro. However, a lot of the examples given in this book are from the 1980s and 1990s. A lot has changed in our country since then. Some things have not. If you are looking to get a perfect snapshot of what the justice system looks like today then I’m not sure this book will give you the best picture. If, though, you are looking to see where we have been as a country, how far we have come, and where we still have to go, then I think you will really appreciate this book. Regardless of your motive for picking up this book you will find it well worth your time.
I do want to warn you that while this book is very well written with a compelling true story line woven through it, it deals with very heavy topics. There are disturbing and very sad stories, all true, that you will read in this book. Be forewarned that this is not a light and fun book to read, although there is hope and optimism woven in as well. Prepare yourself- and dive in!
Quick reminder that this post contains affiliate links; that means if you click on the link I will make a small commission at no extra cost to you- it’s a way to support my blog! I will only ever share an affiliate link if I love the product and think that you just might love it too!
Parker J Palmer, Author of Let Your LIfe Speak, had been on the fast track for success. He had graduated at the top of his class, went to a good college and was on track for a tenured position at Georgetown University when he suddenly realized- he didn’t really want to do that. He started changing careers, first one thing then another, none of them lasting that long or feeling like the right thing for him. He then started feeling like a failure; he had graduated college with the brightest of futures in front of him and now here he was living a very ordinary life and not making much progress towards anything since he didn’t know what he wanted.
Eventually he finds himself led to a Quaker retreat home, a place to seek God’s will and try to hear His voice. During his time there he is offered a job as president of a college. He is ready to take the job but he decided to discuss this offer with a group of Quakers that he has grown close to. One of his friends asks him what he would like about the job. Parker starts listing the things he wouldn’t like- having to speak on behalf of the college to the media, all the obligatory events he would have to go to, etc. His friend gently breaks in and reminds Parker that he was supposed to be listing the things he would like about the job. Parker then has to admit, both to himself and his friends, that in fact, the thing he likes most about the job is the title and the paycheck. It then becomes clear that this is not what Parker should do.
This moment serves as a pivotal point in which Parker realizes he needs to consider what is most important to him in a job. He realizes that he needs to look at what he’s always liked to do, and how he can utilize that in a career. He thought he wanted to teach because he loves books, learning and sharing information. What he ends up realizing is that through writing and activism he can use those same gifts and abilities.
Parker then looks back over his life and realizes that there were small arrows from the time he was a small boy on pointing him in this direction. He focused on where he could easily apply his gifts to make a good living. In the end however this left him feeling empty and purposeless. He then had to go back and look for all the little clues from his life. He had to let his life speak about finding his vocation.
There are many ways to use our gifts. So often we focus on either the way in which our gifts could be used most lucratively, or the most common way in which people with our gifts typically use them- even if there is another field in which our gifts can be used that we are more passionate about. We worry that taking the way less traveled will lead to failure. I think it is worth pointing out that people are generally most successful when they focus their life work on areas that they are passionate about. I believe we let the fear of it being hard to make a living at a specific vocation scare us away from trying it. But what is going to be harder- spending your days going to a job that you don’t like and have to force yourself to go to each day; or making a living from an area where it can be challenging, but in which you are so passionate that you wake up each day excited to get to work? And let us not forget that the top tier in any field can be financially successful. If you are truly passionate and driven in your chosen field I believe you will eventually succeed- although it may get very hard and take longer than you wish. Avoiding one’s greatest passions will never lead to a fulfilled life. It is rather the dedication day after day in an area in which we are truly passionate that will lead us to the most fulfilled life, and allow us to make the impact that we were put on this earth to make.
I challenge you to look at your life, what are the clues pointing you to a certain path? In what ways has your life “spoken” to you? What have you always loved? How did you spend your free time as a child? When you are free of obligations what do you find yourself doing or wanting to do? We have one life on this earth and in the words of Mary Oliver, “Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” Listen and let your life speak to you.
Quick reminder that this post contains affiliate links; that means if you click on the link I will make a small commission at no extra cost to you- it’s a way to support my blog! I will only ever share an affiliate link if I love the product and think that you just might love it too!
Summer is basically over- I am fighting the urge to cry about this fact. My first reaction is always to bemoan how quickly the summer has gone- but fall is lovely too! There is still a lot to enjoy outdoors before the weather changes. And there will be cool mornings and crisp evenings to enjoy both outside and inside. Regardless of where you will be enjoying this transition time here are 3 cozy mystery series to transition you from summer to fall.
Lighthouse Library Mystery Series by Eva Gates
Maybe start this series while it is still summer! This series is set in a fictional town in the outer banks, in an old light house that has been converted into a library. Lucy is enjoying her brand new dream job at the LightHouse Library, just getting familiar with the job and the townspeople. It is an exciting time as the library will be hosting a traveling exhibit of first edition Jane Austen books. Things go from great to terrible however when someone ends up dead during the party. The situation only gets worse as one by one books front the traveling exhibit start to disappear. This catapults Lucy’s job position from one of security to a very tenuous nature indeed.
I loved the small town feel embodied in this book, the discussion of Jane Austen’s work and the coastal setting.
Emily was just your average English professor at a small college when her great aunt dies and she suddenly finds herself the heiress of a large estate- but there are some suspicious things surrounding her aunt’s death… Emily tries to ignore all these things that seem not quite right but when there is another death Emily can no longer ignore her intuition that all is not as it seems.
I also enjoyed that there are a lot of references to Jane Austen and her works in this book- the English professor side of Emily peaks out throughout the books pages. If it’s been a while since you’ve picked up one of the classics you may find yourself inspired to do so after reading one of the books in this series!
Placed in a quaint, coastal Oregon town, and taking place on an estate known as windy hill there are a lot of references to the stormy ocean that makes you want to simultaneously take a walk along the beach and curl up in a cozy chair.
The quaint setting of this series pulled me in right away. Set in New Hampshire, book town is a tourist attraction where all the shops are specially store dedicated to one specific genre. The main character, Trisha Miles, owns and operates a mystery book store that further specializes in vintage mysteries. Alas, it seems that all of Trisha’s years as a mystery enthusiast were preparing her for all the sleuthing she will have to do as mystery after mystery shows up on her front door, earning her the title of village jinks.
I love the settings of these books. There’s something about a town built around books, about the day to day life as a small business owner, and the quirky personalities of the characters that just draws the reader in. Current mysteries, classic mysteries, if you are a mystery lover that is in need of some additional titles to pick up then you will find your list of to be read titles refreshed after reading this! While I would not classify this series as a great work of fiction there is something cozy and comforting about this series- like having a chai latte on the first cool day of fall! And there are lots of mysteries sprinkled throughout the book that will have you pulling out your mixing bowls and baking something delicious to munch on as you read.
If you are looking for the next great American Novel, you’ll be disappointed in these books. However if you are looking for a book that keeps your attention and provides distraction from everyday life, then you’ll enjoy these. They are light, easy, fun reads! Each of these books will help to develop your interest in the classics and it will have you wanting to either pull out one of your favorite classics or pick up one of the classics that you have been meaning to read for years. Maybe you’ll even be motivated to pick up that one that you were supposed to read in high school but that you only read the notes on in order to pass the test. 😉 If you are looking for something light and enjoyable, fairly clean of offensive language, violence and explicit sex scenes, then take a look at the three cozy mystery series I have enjoyed, and that you just might too!
Quick reminder that this post contains affiliate links; that means if you click on the link I will make a small commission at no extra cost to you- it’s a way to support my blog! I will only ever share an affiliate link if I love the product and think that you just might love it too!
I had been looking forward to reading Gretchen Rubin’s book, The Four Tendencies, for a while now and it did not disappoint! This book cIassifies four basic personality types and offers insights into each one ranging from how to better understand family members, to tips on how to get your coworkers to clean up their dishes in the break room!
Ms Rubin’s premise for The Four Tendencies, is that there are 4 basic personality types; the Upholder, the Obliger, the Questioner, and the Rebel, which she has identified through studies conducted via her website. While everyone has a unique mix of all of these tendencies, everyone has one tendency that is dominant. This categorization of personality types is helpful because 1) It is fairly easy to identify each type, and 2) the Four Tendencies assessment is very reaction driven. While every personal assessment tool is helpful to better understand ourselves and in working with others, the Four Tendencies offers tactical tools on both how to understand our reactions, and the reactions of others. Knowing how we are predisposed to react in a given situation and why is key to then being able to manipulate the situation in order to drive the best results. The same is true with others; when we know going into a situation that an approach will most likely be perceived we can then alter our approach accordingly.
The Upholder
The first tendency is the Upholder. Upholders are the people who have very little problem setting and keeping New Year’s resolutions. When they say they want to start running in the mornings, or meditating before bed they generally follow through with it. Nothing gets an Upholder more excited than a brand new planner! They thrive on having a schedule and sticking to it. In a work situation Upholders are the ones that you know you can trust to get something done when you tell them to do it. They tend to unquestioningly obey rules that are placed before them. They can tend to be a little rigid and uptight and don’t like to have plans change on them at the last minute. Upholders also tend to have a strong sense of self preservation, they can sense when they are approaching burnout and will usually combat against it. Similarly while they may want to make others happy and be accommodating they have no problem saying no when they are at their limit. Upholders have the advantage of being able to keep habits and routines for their lives but they do have to work to remember that it is ok to allow for flexibility in their schedules to work around others and this does not mean that their lives are falling apart!
The Obliger
The second tendency Ms Rubin identifies is the Obliger. Obligers are the ones we know we can count on, though they can’t necessarily count on themselves. They are the people who are all about keeping others happy; they can be counted on to just about always be obliging to others. But that’s the key, they need external accountability. Obligers have a very hard time keeping to a new habit or resolution simply because they have said that they will. Most obligers have given up ever making New Year’s resolutions because they know they will not keep them. Rather they need to confide in someone who will follow up and see if they are sticking with their new resolution. Obligers thrive when they have someone else counting on them. The trick for obligers is to make sure they have external accountability built into their everyday lives. A large percent of the population are obligers.
The Questioner
The third tendency is the Questioner. The questioner is the one who needs to know why. Why is that new rule needed? Why shouldn’t we eat donuts for breakfast every morning? Are donuts even that bad for us? For the questioner is not a matter of rule or no rule, it is a question of whether they find that rule arbitrary or not. If they can be convinced by a reason, that is valid to them, that something is worth doing, then they will. If not, then they won’t. While questioners can generally keep a resolution or habit if they set their mind to it, they find a date such as January first arbitrary. When dealing with a Questioner don’t waste your breath telling them that they should do something, rather explain the research behind why they may want to and allow them time to do some of their own research. Questioners do have to come to grips with the fact though that there is always more research that can be done and eventually it is time to take action- preferably before they drive their friends and family crazy! A large percentage of the population are also questioners.
The Rebel
The last tendency is the Rebel. While this is the smallest percentage of the population I’ll guarantee that you know at least one rebel- they are hard to miss! Rebels hate to be told what to do, even if it’s something that they want to do or work on in themselves, when they start telling themselves that they should or must do something all over. Rebels will generally never make a New Years resolution, because saying that they have to do something will make them rebel! Instead rebels need to tell themselves that they can do whatever they want. That is how others can best work with rebels. By explaining how and why they need a rebel to do something, but ultimately leaving it up to them as to how, when, or even if they want to do it. The more you can make the rebel think something is their idea, and leave it up to them the better the results for everyone!
Still confused about which one you are? The Four Tendencies also includes a questionnaire so you no longer have to wonder. This is one of those rare books that is not only fun and engaging to read, but one from which you will surely glean at least one,(if not many), nuggets to take away and start implanting right away! Get your own copy of the Four Tendencies here:
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If you are anything like me, or most of America, there is just never enough time. Not only is there not enough time to do everything we want to do, but sometimes there isn’t even enough time to enjoy what we do have time to do. We rush from one thing to the next, feeling guilty for not doing the other thing- any other thing! And then on the rare occasion when we finally stay home to rest because we feel burnt out, we don’t truly let ourselves relax because we are so focused on what we are missing. All this, day after day, leaves us with less and less energy, and to do lists that are still too long.
This is not a new problem in our culture, and it is not one that will disappear anytime soon. But what if there was a way to truly savor the time we do have? What if we could stretch out time to make it feel like we have all the time in the world- time enough to enjoy what is most important to us?
This is the topic that Laura Vanderkam’s book, Off the Clock, covers. Click here for your copy, https://amzn.to/3avfUw2. In this book, Ms Vanderkam covers in depth not only how to carve out time for hobbies and activities that are important to us, even in the most hectic schedules, but also how to enjoy the time we take on these activities to the fullest. She also shows that how by really immersing ourselves in these activities time can seem to lengthen and stretching turning tiny blocks into mini vacations! Then when we go back to work our or our todo list we do so refreshed and more effective!
After reading her book at the beginning of the year, my husband and I sat down and made a list of some of our favorite time-stretching outings that we enjoy doing together. With summer now upon us and wanting to drink up every drop of the nice weather that we waited so long for, here in Western Pennsylvania at least, we then revised the list into some of our favorite little dates that are especially enjoyable to do in the outdoors. By taking a couple hours out each weekend we have been able to make our weekends feel so much more like a vacation and I find that doing one of the following activities at the beginning of the weekend really helps to break the tension from the week and spring me into relaxation mode!
Hiking
We are beyond blessed to live in a rural area where we can walk out our front door and enjoy a pleasant walk on a one lane road. However if we would like a more rigorous workout we have 2 state parks within a 10 minute drive that we can go to for some real hiking. Some of our best conversations happen while we are hiking. There’s something about being surrounded by nature that makes for great, rambling and unhurried conversation. Even if you don’t live in a rural area, what about strolling down the hip new part of town where all the cool shops are? Also most cities have trials for biking and walking now too!
Having a Campfire
I know this isn’t feasible everywhere, but if possible it is more than worth the effort it takes! Much like hiking, being outside in the evening around a fire has a way a stretching out time, making an evening that might otherwise slip into monotony be just a little bit more memorable. If you can’t have a campfire, what about watching the sunset? This is another way to pause and drink in a few minutes of relaxation.
Yard Saling
Getting moving bright and early on a weekend is my idea of a good time; for my husband- not so much! But we both agree that the experience is worth it! We rarely buy much during these outings but we love seeing other people’s past treasures. It makes you really think about the passage of time and how transient this life is. And it is a great way to keep an eye out for items to fluff up your decor! One of our favorite days last year we stopped by a local coffee shop, got our coffee to go, and then walked around a section of town that was having a group yard sale. We found a few things we loved and then hit a place from brunch before heading home. I think we were home by 11 with most of the day left to enjoy and do any earth shattering chores. We spent under $30 for everything we did that day, and it was one of the most special days I can remember from last year.
Coffee Dates
I briefly mentioned it above but finding an adorable little coffee shop with their own specialty drinks is one of our favorite date go-tos! Many of them have outdoor seating and I love starting the day off early with something fun, and then being able to get my work done the rest of the day. My husband loves his coffee and its such a fun way to ease into the day!
Picnics
Last but not least there are picnics, and these can be done so many different ways! From picnicking in the living room, to at a state park, or from a bench overlooking a river, each location carries a charm all its own. I love to bring fresh veggies, crackers, bread, cheese and some fruit and let everyone put together their own flavor combinations. Sometimes it’s just the act of switching up the everyday routine that can help flip the switch from dull everyday status to vacation mode!
I hope those ideas helped to inspire you to enjoy your time a little more! If you want to dive deeper into the topic of enjoying time be sure to check our Ms Vanderkam’s book; Off the Clock, and in the meantime what are some of your favorite ways to stretch out time? I’d love to hear from you!
As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. Here’s a great link for you to pick up your copy of the book at no extra cost to you by visiting Amazon through Essentially EmmaMarie. Here’s Laura Vanderkam’s book, Off the Clockhttps://amzn.to/3avfUw2. Thank you!
With summer just beginning I have found myself in such a beach-read reading mood. I want something light, uplifting and fun; one that is delicious, you can just picture reading on a beach with your toes in the sand, or by a pool with a lemonade in your hand! At the end of the book though, I still want to feel that I have gained knowledge or have been made to think about a subject or topic. That is exactly what Elin Hilderbrand did for me with her book Summer of ‘69. Settle in and be ready to be taken on a delightful, but still thoughtful, ride.
Summer of ‘69 is the first book I’ve read by Ms Hilderbrand but I don’t think it will be the last! In this story Ms Hilderbrand tells the story of a fictional family set with the backdrop of the turbulent year of 1969. I love historical fiction and while I don’t usually find myself picking up a historical fiction work set as recently as the 1960’s I found I enjoyed it very much. I have a tendency to skip over the 1960’s, they happened way before I was born, but not so long ago that I think to go back and read about them as I would the decades before. My parents were alive in the 1960’s- how could it be considered history already??
Ms Hilderbrand artfully weaves together fact and fiction as she tells the story of the Levin family. Tiger, the only son, serves in Vietnam. Mrs. Levin struggles to keep her secrets hidden, secrets about the past and the present. Blair, The eldest daughter, struggles in her relationship with her husband as he works on the moon launch and is never at home during her tough pregnancy. Kirby, the wild middle child, protested the war before her brother was called up, now she struggles with her stance on the war while she continues fighting for the women’s liberation movement and for racial equality. Jessy is the youngest member of the family, she paradoxically fights both to be seen and not to be seen while everyone is caught up in their own drama and doesn’t seem to have time for her. All of this family drama in the midst of world chaos: assassinations from the previous year, the Vietnam war is on, and then there is also a little incident at Chappaquiddick that summer involving the Kennedys…. all of this wound tightly into the story of one family that is trying their hardest to have a normal fun summer…..
If you’re in the mood for a gripping summer read that can make you feel the sand under your feet while simultaneously taking you back in time-then I recommend this book to you! I hope you enjoy it!
Quick reminder that this post contains affiliate links; that means if you click on the link I will make a small commission at no extra cost to you- it’s a way to support my blog! I will only ever share an affiliate link if I love the product and think that you just might love it too!
